Don’t Rear-end Santa: Drive Safely this Holiday Season

One sure way to get on Santa’s naughty list is to rear-end him this Christmas season.

Several years back, my boyfriend dressed as Santa as he does every year.

He hopped into his car to drive down to his business (the martial arts studio) where he would teach classes and amuse the kids.

I mean, if I were a kid and I got to see Santa punching, kicking, cartwheeling, and flipping, that would be a pretty sweet deal. Usually St. Nicholas is a fatherly fellow flying in a sleigh. This, however, was far more entertaining.

He was driving along, thinking about the activities he would have folks do that evening, waiting to make his turn, and then BANG!

He had been rear-ended.

He pulled over to see the kid who did the damage, and I wish, for just a few moments, I could be in that poor teenager’s head to see what ran through his mind when he saw Santa: suit, hat, beard and boots-the whole nine yards-hop out of the vehicle he just hit.

Of all the people he could have hit being reckless…it just tickles me to think about it.

“Uh…I just called my dad…” the boy said.

Santa nodded.


How did that phone call go? “Dad? Can you come out here? I just hit…Santa…rear-ended him…”

“Son? That’s funny, for a moment I thought you said you rear-ended Santa. Come again?”

“I did. I said I hit Santa. You know, Claus…? Jolly old St. Nick? Only, I don’t think he’s that jolly right now because of the dent in his rear bumper.”

Then I wonder…how many presents did that kid get on Christmas that year? Because, the way I see it, rear-ending Santa is a sure way to get on his naughty list.

Drive safely this holiday season!

Santa and Me


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