It’s one word. It’s a girl, I’m presuming. I’ve never met her.

I beat the Eastcoastqueen, chezzzz:), igtpwned, sunefnuff, Jo M, and Scramble C…

But LizzieDaley.

No, not her. Not LizzieDaley. Match after match. Blood, sweat, tears….and I’ve lost. Every time.

She’s invaded my dreams. I fought to my 30th demise against this LizzieDaley. It’s like Amy Farrah Fowler from the Big Bang Theory. You just have to say her whole name, or else it is not right. After this epically tragic battle in my Scramble with Friends App, where, once more, I lost to this LizzieDaley, I fell into a fitful sleep.

I dreamed I was in the dojo, and my boyfriend was teaching the black belt teen Konsei class just before kickboxing.

I walked in with one of my girl friends, joking about how the day I say “I’ll finally get to take a class because there won’t be a new person in class” is the day a new person is guaranteed to show up. “But not tonight, I told her. Tonight, no new people!”

As we entered, just inside the door, was a girl, a girl with blond hair pulled into a tight ponytail, blue kickboxing gloves on her hands, looking nervous, watching the black belt class, clearly waiting to try kickboxing. My friend told me, “Looks like you are helping a new person. You jinxed it.” I smiled. I DO like helping new people. But this girl…this girl held a vibe I didn’t like. Too inviting for me. Something was amiss.

I approached her tentatively. Why did she look SOOOO friendly? Something was wrong.

I introduced myself slowly, holding my hand out cautiously for her to shake.

“Hi!” she replied enthusiastically. …TOO enthusiastically.

“I’m LizzieDaley.”

I stared at her, speechless. My mouth dropped.

“Is something wrong?” she asked me, innocently.

“No, nothing at all. Don’t worry,” I replied. “You’ll love kickboxing. It’s great.”

I took off in a sprint across the room just as my boyfriend finished teaching the teen’s class, and I grabbed him by both shoulders.

“That…That new girl…” I began. “I can’t teach her. I CAN’T!!!”

“Why? What’s wrong with her? She seems nice.”

“SHE’S LIZZIEDALEY!!! ONE WORD!!! Anybody with a first and last name for one word has a problem!!! She beats me in Scramble with Friends! Endlessly! And now she is HERE!!!!!”

That’s all I remember. Then I woke up, grabbed my ipod out of the drawer below my mattress, pulled out Scramble with Friends, played a quick match against LizzieDaley, lost again, and then fell back to sleep.

So dear, dear, LizzieDaley. I do not know who you are…but let me assure you of this…one day, my vocabulary will surpass yours. One day, I WILL beat you in Scramble with friends.

I shall train my fingers to be swifter, my neural connections to be more numerous, my vocabulary to become more immense in size…

So beware. The day will come…That day….That day is

… soon.


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